BUY THIS BOOK! Why Scott McClellen is my new hero!

Scott McClellan was Bush's press secretary during some of the most important debacles of his administration: The selling of the Iraq war and the "outing" of CIA agent Valerie Plame (because her husband had collected information that proved that the Bush administration was at least exaggerating the reasons why Iraq was worth invading).

While I have not read the book yet myself, the excerpts released thusfar are DEVASTATING to President Bush, his administration, his legacy, and the entire Iraq debacle. Over 4,000 of our soldiers and countless civilians have been killed as a result of lies and spin. Not to mention the damage to America's reputation, the billions spent every month, and the fact that this war has created more terrorists than it has prevented or eliminated.

Mr. McClellan himself calls Iraq an unnecessary war.

Here is some video from the Today Show, with analysis from NBC's White House reporter (and my secret boyfriend) David Gregory (or "Stretch," to you, Mr. President):



Here's Tim Russert's reaction:



I'm not sure about Scott McClellan's motivations; perhaps his guilt over his complicity in this outrageous un-American administration have finally caught up with him. But his book finally spells out what we have all known, from a man who worked with Bush for 10 years, who followed him to Washington from Texas.

Thank you, Scott McClellan. You may have made a giant mistake in choosing your friends and employer, but thank you for having the balls to own up to your mistakes, the grievous mistakes of those "friends," and finally telling the truth which the American people have known about this President from the start.

I can't believe it, but Scott McClellan is my new hero. Now, he's free to do some anti-war campaigning for Barack Obama. A girl can dream!

Musings on Married Men -And Advice for the Ladies!

As any woman, I have suffered inappropriate sexual attention most of my life. I had and still have my share of disgusting propositions from men of every race, creed, age, and station in life. But the absolute worst for me are the propositions of the already married man.

As a younger person, I enjoyed this attention one particular time---and good ol' Instant Karma continues to pay me back in spades. Unfortunately for everyone involved, there were real feelings there, but I still never entertained the idea that he would leave her for me. I was immature, charmed and dickmatized---blunt, but too true.

Because of my experience, and the fact that I am forever looking for my own real, loving, sexual marriage and the most banal of adventures with a male life-partner, I find the attentions I receive from already "taken" fellows to be a real downer.

We all know that men, married or not, love "Strange." Whether they actually intend to sexually cheat or not, there is something in their biology which makes them very prone to distraction. And as a thin-ish, decent-looking woman, I have married men's neediness imposed upon me all the time. As I am painfully shy, I cannot flirt very well with available dudes. But with the marrieds, I suffer no such discomfort, because (at least I know) it's going nowhere. Unfortunately, my perceived "confidence" only encourages them. Here are the reasons, in my opinion, that married men are frequently seeking my (and others') intimate society:

1. Many people, especially those in the Midwest, marry in their early 20's, to people they don't necessarily know very well. It's often just the "thing to do" after college. They may choose the "right" kind of person from the "right" family, but these shallow standards for a life partner will doom the union to divorce or infidelity. Of all the wedding receptions I have witnessed as a former server and bartender, the saddest (AND most common), are those that disintegrate into men-on-one-side, women-on-the-other. This type is seen mostly in the 20's age-group.

2. After the honeymoon phase, as people naturally change and mature, they find their commonalities diminish, and 'suddenly' have little about which to converse with their partners. I have noticed also, that many, many women to this day actually believe that expressing ideas intelligently is "unfeminine." This is queer, as I can tell you that is mostly my CONVERSATION that makes THIS plainish-Jane irresistible to marrieds.

[2a. To my fellow opinionated ladies: If, in the early stages of dating a man, he EVER degrades, cruelly dismisses, or refuses to even listen to your opinions---RUN AWAY AS FAST AS YOU CAN. Not only is this the hallmark of a future abuser (physical OR psychological), but this type of man is NOT looking for an equal partnership. He is usually insecure and pathetic, and not worth your time.]

3. After the children arrive, the wife very often becomes much less attentive to entertaining her husband. Her priorities change (mostly rightly), but this leaves the gentleman feeling neglected and starved for attention. And I will "glove-slap" any person who would try and deny that most men are merely grown-up babies themselves. I may be as-yet barren and unmarried, but ladies, the way to keep your husband faithful is to continue to "baby" him at least some of the time.

[3a. Also after the children arrive, wives very often "lose their figures" and/or become less concerned with being dolled-up as much as they were before the marriage. Men are visual, and can be "stick-it-anywhere" sexual, and their attentions can be easily stolen by something newer and cuter. Especially when "new and cute" is accompanied by "stupid and skanky." ]

[3b. Occasional gifts of oral sex (especially in random places and times) can make any man forget your "baby weight" or sags and bags. I emphasize the "surprise" factor, because any unpredictability you can maintain in an otherwise predictable sex-life will keep him guessing and wanting you more.]

And so when I, a single, mostly unwrinkled, doughy but genetically ectomorphic blonde woman enters their fields of vision, these gentlemen are immediately attracted. And when I open my mouth and they realize I have something to say--that they can talk with me about subjects in a cogent manner that they normally can only discuss with other men---well, a girl like me becomes CATNIP for the self-pitying 'neglected' family man. When I see or suspect that a man is married, I always start as polite but guarded. But as his attentions and conversation drift into flirtation or neediness, I shut it down. Woefully often, I have been guessed as or even accused of being a "lesbian," simply because I refuse to veer into the inappropriate with a man who nightly shares his bed with his legally-sanctioned life partner.

Thank you gentlemen, but I want to start my own FRESH love-story.

I will end with an anecdote: After working a shift at my server job one evening, I made plans for a late dinner with a friend. As I was not permitted to wait off-the-clock at my own job whilst wearing my (completely sexless, sensible-shoe) uniform, my friend and I agreed to meet at a very nice bar nearby. I got there first, and while I DESPISE sitting as a woman alone at a bar, I was comfortable because of my unflattering outfit, and because I knew all the employees at said bar. I chatted with the bartender, expecting no "trouble."
But, ah! The "trouble" found me! A very attractive 40-something man with a wedding ring galloped over within minutes. He introduced himself, and I bemusedly allowed him to begin to engage me. After 30 seconds, I made a huge, pointing spectacle and loud comment about his wedding ring.
And thus he began his too-trite protestations: He was so lonely, his wife was in name only, she just "didn't understand him" anymore.
With the luckiest of timing, at that very moment, I spied my friend walking in the door. I turned to face this ridiculous fellow, and loudly admonished, "Well, maybe if you'd go home and FUCK YOUR WIFE, perhaps she'd start to 'understand' you better."

And so I left him, mouth agape, and laughed all the way out the door. What a jack-ass.

Marilyn and Jackie illustration: Chris Pyle
(courtesy of ew.com)

So it's come to this...

Really Hillary? Firstly, Bill Clinton actually "wrapped up" his nomination in 1992 in MARCH. Secondly, what on Earth could cause you to reference RFK's tragic death as a reason not to drop out? Do you think that if Obama met such a fate, that you could not simply "step back in?"

This is the second reference to assassinating Obama that has been made by a 2008 Presidential candidate recently. The first was made by a former Republican candidate, Mike Huckabee. During his speech at an N.R.A. meeting, Huckabee joked that a loud crash offstage was actually Obama ducking a gun. Hilarious, right? Well, EVEN the most avid gun-rights enthusiasts would never joke about killing an innocent human being. That kind of "joke" is firmly opposed to one of the main goals of the N.R.A.: The mainstreaming of so-called "responsible" gun ownership.

Huckabee's a jackass who has no internal filter when cameras are on him---This phenomenon is common, regardless of politics (see Reverend Wright).

But Hillary is MUCH smarter and more savvy. EVERYTHING she says and does in her campaign, whether it has been successful or not, has been calculated and strategized to within an inch of its life.
I will never believe that these are innocent remarks. Keith Olbermann was right on about it, but he couldn't go so far as I can here. I think she wouldn't mind if Obama got taken out.

Bill Clinton was the first President I was old enough to vote for. He was a great one. And I always admired Hillary. But with this campaign's racist remarks (by both Clintons), and now this "innocent" reminder about the LAST Presidential candidate who was trying to empower the poor and minorities (and was WINNING) getting shot.... I am sickened, saddened, and I will never believe she made the reference accidentally.

The Clintons have betrayed their own legacies, and have betrayed me as a Democrat and an American.

I may not have lived through the terrible assassinations of JFK, MLK, and RFK......but I will admit here, my friends, that once in a while, when I check the news, I half-expect to hear that something terrible has happened to Barack Obama. Because he IS a modern-day Kennedy. Because hope is dangerous. And because the status quo is a powerful muse to nutcases with guns.

So what is Hillary waiting for? I think she just told us.

First, Hillary says that we Obama supporters are all sexist! (Even us Feminists!) Now it's: 'You know, he could get shot....'

Watch your mouth, Hillary. It only takes one person, one gun. Is your disappointment and rabid quest for power really worth a veiled threat against ANOTHER candidate of HOPE?

I thought you were better than that. I thought you were better than MOST of you behavior in this campaign. You hurt yourself, your husband, the Kennedy family, and all compassionate, thinking Americans. This is NOT the country we live in, a country where coups are commonplace.

We believe in the process, Senator Clinton. And despite what your deepest wishes and hopes might have been, YOU LOST. It's time to salvage any dignity you have left and DROP OUT.

When President Obama's terms have expired, the only hope you have for a future run is 2016. Perhaps by that time, you will have learned compassion, purged your bitterness, and hope against hope that we Democrats have short enough memories.

Because as of now, Hillary, you are a disgrace.

Love is Love

My first post!

Recently, the California Supreme Court made a decision regarding the most important civil rights issue of modern times: They overturned an earlier ban on same-sex marriage, which ostensibly allows gays to legally get married in the state of California.

For now.

(Wikipedia.org has a great page detailing same-sex marriage laws in the U.S. Unfortunately, I cannot yet figure out how to link it here.)

Well, Gays will be getting legally married, until the "Christian" Right sets their sights on this one again...resulting in yet another proposition that will surely be on the ballot A.S.A.P. The legislature had already attempted to make gay marriage legal in California.... and Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger vetoed it. He vows to veto it again.

So, until the wheels of legislation turn, gay couples will be allowed, for a bit, to receive real legal documents as a public declaration of their commitment in California.

Gay rights have always been important to me; most of my friends over the years have been gay men. I've also had the experience of knowing hetero folks with all sorts of predilections, and I won't go into the sordid reasons that my "type" is blonde and redheaded men.

The point is, that once you actually KNOW gay people, you realize that they are no better and no worse than anyone else out there.

And honestly, does anyone really have the time or energy to keep up with whom random strangers choose to have sex? As long as they are sober enough, willing, and over 18, it's really none of our business.

But gay marriage is about more than sex. It's about love. About carving out a life for yourself and a partner. And the reasons for legal marriage for gays are NOT always merely romantic.

As an example, I will use a friend's story.....

"Lenny" and "Ed" had been together over 10 years as a monogamous couple. Lenny had previously been married to a woman, and they had children. In his late 20's, Lenny realized that he was actually attracted to men, and a fairly amicable split from his wife was arranged. (Funnily enough, Lenny's wife "came out" herself after the divorce.)

Lenny then met and fell in love with Ed, and Lenny had legal custody of his children. Right here in the state of Indiana, a couple of gay men raised these children for 10 years. Through thick and thin, richer or poorer, chemical addictions, and health concerns, Lenny and Ed stuck together.

When Lenny had originally "come out," his relatives disowned him, and refused to EVER acknowledge his homosexuality. That was very tough for Lenny and Ed, but they soldiered on through the years, together as a couple, raising a family.

One day, quite suddenly, Lenny had a massive heart attack. Ed was the only person there to witness the love of his life dying brutally before his eyes. Ed called 911, attempted CPR--but Lenny died. He was not even 40 years old.

It was then up to Ed to tell Lenny's children, who were by this time young adults. Ed had to call Lenny's workplace, all their mutual friends, and made the call to those very relatives who had rejected Lenny, and denied the reality of his identity. Through an ocean of tears, it was Ed who made the calls to let everyone know that Lenny had so suddenly died.

Some families, when faced with exactly the same situation, realize what a mistake they had made by cutting their gay relative out of the family. But Lenny's family was different. They stuck to their guns, and barred Ed from even seeing Lenny's body at the hospital. Ed didn't even get the chance to say goodbye to his beloved partner of 10 years, because the law states you must be a relative or MARRIED to have access to a patient. These relatives even ignored the protests of Lenny's children, who loved Ed as a parent. And Lenny's extended family, who had always had contact with his kids, successfully guilted them into keeping quiet about their father's life and his wishes.

After over 10 years of estrangement, Lenny's extended family made all the decisions for him after his death. They gave Lenny a Catholic funeral, a faith that Lenny had adamantly abandoned years before. Ed knew what Lenny would have wanted, but Ed was never asked, nor even contacted about the arrangements.

The point is that if Lenny and Ed had been legally married, as they had openly wished to be, then the decisions about his passing could have been made by the person who knew him best. The person with whom he had chosen to share his life. Instead, Lenny, his life, his very identity, and his most intimate wishes were trumped by a group of people who, when they could not accept him as he was, had abandoned him years before.

Even worse, Lenny's family, including cousins that Ed had never even heard of, came and picked through Lenny's personal effects, and took anything and everything they wanted, especially items of value. They even took the car that Lenny and Ed had shared, as it happened to be titled in Lenny's name. Ed called the police, but he was told he had no legal recourse whatsoever, because as far as the law was concerned, he was nobody in relation to Lenny.

Of course, these heartless vultures could have never done this, if Ed and Lenny had had a notarized piece of paper to legitimize their union.

So when I hear opposition to allowing gays to marry, I always think of those tragic months for Ed, the loving partner left out and left behind.

No, not every hetero couple chooses to get married, and most who do usually aren't even thinking of the legal rights they acquire on that day. But for so many years (centuries even), married people have taken those rights for granted.

Love is Love, my friends. No matter your gender or sexuality, when you think about gay marriage, think about Ed and Lenny. They shared a decade of intimacy, life decisions, animated discussions and disagreements, and thousands of whispered "pillow-talk" conversations, and knew the very deepest parts of each other's psyches.

And that love and commitment meant 'nothing' after Lenny's death, because they both happened to be men.

A few months ago, after a mutual friend was also widowed, I got the chance to talk to Ed about Lenny for the first time in years.
"I always thought we'd be together forever," Ed told me, holding back tears.
My half-whispered reply was the only thing I could think to say:
"Remember Ed, you were his forever, and always will be."